Hiding in your closet
Aug. 24th, 2004 09:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spiderpig[I should be studying for my Chem mock. But I need to get this out of my system. Besides, I spent the whole fucking afternoon chewing information on sulphuric acid, potassium dichromate and if I don't stop, I think my insides will shrivel up.]
People are scared of things they don't understand. This fear can come in many degrees, from the intense terror of feeling or seeing something that you shouldn't, to the incredulous disbelief that you might hold for something.
Children are scared of ghosts, the boogeyman, the monster in the closet or under their bed. Its a natural and normal thing. Then again, even if one isn't openly afraid of the unknown, there is a sort of wary-respect.
When I was younger, I used to be fascinated with vampires (both Chinese and Western), witch-doctors, ghosts and the supernatural. I'd pore over every horror themed book I could get my tiny hands on and read them everywhere. I used to believe firmly that there was a child vampire living in the "inbetween" of my ceiling and roof, and that he'd pop his head down from the ventilation shafts to say hello. And of course to occasionally suck my blood. Luckily, it was only the mosquitoes and nothing else.
Once that child-like innocence had faded away, my brother and I became more aware that the supernatural might be real. We reasoned that if so many people had encounters, good or bad, they must exist in some form or another, yes? Thus, during our nightly trips to the toilet, we'd shake each other awake and whisper that we need to go and could you please accompany me and stand watch outside the toilet? If the other didn't want to wake up, we'd grope out way to the nearby toilet, which is actually around 10 steps from the room, and have our eyes dart around, widened and alert for the slightest movement.
Reading ghost stories took a turn for the worse when I began to believe. Trips to the toilet (even in broad daylight), staying home alone, or just walking through a secluded passage just gave me the shivers. I'd desperately search for a companion to "brave" the circumstances with me. Of course we didn't share a cubicle or anything. :p
Here in Singapore, we have something unique called the "Hungry Ghost Festival", or just Ghost Festival for short. (Some idiots at the Tourism Board translated it as the HUNGARY Ghost Festival. :\) I don't know how it originated or even where, but it has been part and parcel of our lives. Do not step on the ashes that come from burning offerings; do not be rude; offer food, money, material goods to your ancestors; entertain them with "ge tai" literally "song stages". My family doesn't take part actively in these events, only doing the mandatory burning of offerings during "Qing Ming" which is usually at the beginning of the year.
The first day of the Ghost Festival was on Tuesday, if I'm correct. The first day of the Seventh Lunar month.
At first, I thought that it was just a dream, a bad nightmare. Then it came back again. I don't feel comfortable talking about it here in public, but if you're really curious, well, you know how to contact me. Anyway, you can tell that it wasn't pleasant.
A few days ago, my brother told me that I had such an encounter many years before, when I was in primary school. My tuition teacher and mother told me that most probably, my "yun qi", my luck, was down. I still remember, on Wednesday morning, my parents averted their gaze and told me off-handedly that it was "just a nightmare". Somewhere, I wanted to believe them. But that gut-wrenching fear, the feeling of utmost despair... I can't forget it. Neither do I want to experience it ever again.
People are scared of things they don't understand. This fear can come in many degrees, from the intense terror of feeling or seeing something that you shouldn't, to the incredulous disbelief that you might hold for something.
Children are scared of ghosts, the boogeyman, the monster in the closet or under their bed. Its a natural and normal thing. Then again, even if one isn't openly afraid of the unknown, there is a sort of wary-respect.
When I was younger, I used to be fascinated with vampires (both Chinese and Western), witch-doctors, ghosts and the supernatural. I'd pore over every horror themed book I could get my tiny hands on and read them everywhere. I used to believe firmly that there was a child vampire living in the "inbetween" of my ceiling and roof, and that he'd pop his head down from the ventilation shafts to say hello. And of course to occasionally suck my blood. Luckily, it was only the mosquitoes and nothing else.
Once that child-like innocence had faded away, my brother and I became more aware that the supernatural might be real. We reasoned that if so many people had encounters, good or bad, they must exist in some form or another, yes? Thus, during our nightly trips to the toilet, we'd shake each other awake and whisper that we need to go and could you please accompany me and stand watch outside the toilet? If the other didn't want to wake up, we'd grope out way to the nearby toilet, which is actually around 10 steps from the room, and have our eyes dart around, widened and alert for the slightest movement.
Reading ghost stories took a turn for the worse when I began to believe. Trips to the toilet (even in broad daylight), staying home alone, or just walking through a secluded passage just gave me the shivers. I'd desperately search for a companion to "brave" the circumstances with me. Of course we didn't share a cubicle or anything. :p
Here in Singapore, we have something unique called the "Hungry Ghost Festival", or just Ghost Festival for short. (Some idiots at the Tourism Board translated it as the HUNGARY Ghost Festival. :\) I don't know how it originated or even where, but it has been part and parcel of our lives. Do not step on the ashes that come from burning offerings; do not be rude; offer food, money, material goods to your ancestors; entertain them with "ge tai" literally "song stages". My family doesn't take part actively in these events, only doing the mandatory burning of offerings during "Qing Ming" which is usually at the beginning of the year.
The first day of the Ghost Festival was on Tuesday, if I'm correct. The first day of the Seventh Lunar month.
At first, I thought that it was just a dream, a bad nightmare. Then it came back again. I don't feel comfortable talking about it here in public, but if you're really curious, well, you know how to contact me. Anyway, you can tell that it wasn't pleasant.
A few days ago, my brother told me that I had such an encounter many years before, when I was in primary school. My tuition teacher and mother told me that most probably, my "yun qi", my luck, was down. I still remember, on Wednesday morning, my parents averted their gaze and told me off-handedly that it was "just a nightmare". Somewhere, I wanted to believe them. But that gut-wrenching fear, the feeling of utmost despair... I can't forget it. Neither do I want to experience it ever again.
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Date: 2004-08-24 08:45 am (UTC)