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spiderpigAugh. I have to rewrite my whole N&P paper. It's annoying and half of me doesn't want to follow the expected format but I need the grade, so I have to suck it and do it the way the Prof wants it. I honestly, really, don't see the point of this. I'm lost during the lessons, I really don't know what I'm doing or this is the most important thing: why I'm doing this. I suppose it'll all fall into place later, as things always do, but at the moment it's frustrating to be screaming in a vacuum.
As you noticed, we're more than 3/4s into the year and I thought it was time for a change of sorts. Hence the new layout and a gift to myself of 1 year paid time. So say hello to a whole bunch of new userpics (mainly Konata ones, since I'm OCD for matching userpics) like dear old Masi and his Mystery Sock(s)! It's about high time I got a paid account for myself, after years of using LJ and since well, I put out for it. Yay to that spiffy thumbs up sign in my user profile!
Anyway hay guyz, do any of you know of a good wallpaper rotater? I have a whole insane collection of wallpapers and to manualy change them would be a pain in the ass. A doodle for suggestions?
The Fray's How To Save A Life is the kind of song that tugs at your emotions - not heartstrings, though - and makes the ends of your tear ducts vaguely wet. You don't exactly cry, or want to turn into a weeping ball of sorrow but the song evokes a kind of resigned melancholy that just makes you want to stand outside someone's window and sing it so passionately that trees would just burst into flame behind you.
If there's any life I want to save, it would be mine. Think about it - if I'm dead, if you're dead, how would I or you make any changes, do anything at all? We'd be dead. There's only so much poltergeist-ing we can do. And the most we'd achieve is probably just a few more people going psycho. Not a very beneficial thing to contribute to our already screwed up world eh?
In between losing myself in endless serialized dreamscapes, I've been drawing. I've been trying to practice, to create, to make - I need some creative activity that I've been so deprived of. Something in me went away some time ago, it's all so vague that I don't really know what happened to myself. I've become obsessed with the whole notion of school. It's all fun and good but I'm now some robot - just like now - who's sitting in front of her screen and watching her fingers skip across the black and white keys.
That, and I realize that I'm reinforcing my isolationist policies. I don't know if this is a good thing, but I just feel like it. Internet, you are my mouthpiece and I shall speak. My voice is the sound of keys hitting springs and popping back up again; my vision is reflected off millions of pixellated light; my ears are the sounds that reverberate through waves.
I miss reading manga/graphic novels. I have a whole lot to buy, and probably just missed a good chance during the 20% sale Kinokuniya had this weekend. I miss holding the books, getting annoyed at the dustcovers that get in the way, reading about almost ludicrous situations be it romantic, horror or just plain silliness. I want to lose myself in something. MYSTERY SOCK.
So anyway, other things:
Woo, my brother is starting his O Level papers tomorrow. I told him to carry the omamori I bought him in April. Hurhur, maybe I should burn his notes and tell him to drink 'em up.
I apparently have bad control of the steering wheel. I'm kinda irked by my Mohinder-ish driving instructor. It's my bad luck to be getting him for the past two lessons. So what if he looks a little like Mohinder, he's such an ass that I don't really give a damn at the moment. Give me the old but sui bian Uncles that are okay with my steering skills. Fuck, I steer just FINE thank you. It's my fucking CLUTCH that I can't handle because I have insensitive feet. GRAH. When I get my license I will run over him so he won't look like Mohinder anymore. What a waste of potentially good looks.
Gah. School tomorrow. I'm not really looking forward to another day in the National University of Stairs.
As you noticed, we're more than 3/4s into the year and I thought it was time for a change of sorts. Hence the new layout and a gift to myself of 1 year paid time. So say hello to a whole bunch of new userpics (mainly Konata ones, since I'm OCD for matching userpics) like dear old Masi and his Mystery Sock(s)! It's about high time I got a paid account for myself, after years of using LJ and since well, I put out for it. Yay to that spiffy thumbs up sign in my user profile!
Anyway hay guyz, do any of you know of a good wallpaper rotater? I have a whole insane collection of wallpapers and to manualy change them would be a pain in the ass. A doodle for suggestions?
The Fray's How To Save A Life is the kind of song that tugs at your emotions - not heartstrings, though - and makes the ends of your tear ducts vaguely wet. You don't exactly cry, or want to turn into a weeping ball of sorrow but the song evokes a kind of resigned melancholy that just makes you want to stand outside someone's window and sing it so passionately that trees would just burst into flame behind you.
If there's any life I want to save, it would be mine. Think about it - if I'm dead, if you're dead, how would I or you make any changes, do anything at all? We'd be dead. There's only so much poltergeist-ing we can do. And the most we'd achieve is probably just a few more people going psycho. Not a very beneficial thing to contribute to our already screwed up world eh?
One, two three four / tell me that you love me more / sleepless, long nights / that was what my youth was for
In between losing myself in endless serialized dreamscapes, I've been drawing. I've been trying to practice, to create, to make - I need some creative activity that I've been so deprived of. Something in me went away some time ago, it's all so vague that I don't really know what happened to myself. I've become obsessed with the whole notion of school. It's all fun and good but I'm now some robot - just like now - who's sitting in front of her screen and watching her fingers skip across the black and white keys.
That, and I realize that I'm reinforcing my isolationist policies. I don't know if this is a good thing, but I just feel like it. Internet, you are my mouthpiece and I shall speak. My voice is the sound of keys hitting springs and popping back up again; my vision is reflected off millions of pixellated light; my ears are the sounds that reverberate through waves.
I miss reading manga/graphic novels. I have a whole lot to buy, and probably just missed a good chance during the 20% sale Kinokuniya had this weekend. I miss holding the books, getting annoyed at the dustcovers that get in the way, reading about almost ludicrous situations be it romantic, horror or just plain silliness. I want to lose myself in something. MYSTERY SOCK.
So anyway, other things:
Woo, my brother is starting his O Level papers tomorrow. I told him to carry the omamori I bought him in April. Hurhur, maybe I should burn his notes and tell him to drink 'em up.
I apparently have bad control of the steering wheel. I'm kinda irked by my Mohinder-ish driving instructor. It's my bad luck to be getting him for the past two lessons. So what if he looks a little like Mohinder, he's such an ass that I don't really give a damn at the moment. Give me the old but sui bian Uncles that are okay with my steering skills. Fuck, I steer just FINE thank you. It's my fucking CLUTCH that I can't handle because I have insensitive feet. GRAH. When I get my license I will run over him so he won't look like Mohinder anymore. What a waste of potentially good looks.
Gah. School tomorrow. I'm not really looking forward to another day in the National University of Stairs.
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Date: 2007-10-22 03:10 am (UTC)Anyway i love this entry of yours. It really speaks to me somehow. Sometimes i fall into these random phases of isolation and stuff too and generally start shunning people. Quote chuck palahniuk, "it's called cocooning, when your home (and school, in our cases) becomes your whole world". I guess there's no concrete "solution" for it but don't let it make you feel sad!
And stay strong, baba. I wish i had your academic drive.
Oh yeah and one more thing:
nil illegitimo carborundum.
(don't let the bastard get you down!)
<3