spiderpig | carpal tunnel of love

Some people just don't get the point. What's worse, they miss it by a mile.

Today's my Off Day. Off from work, off from monotony of "Hi, how can I help you Sir?", off from the power politics at work, off from having to paste a smile on my face ever single minute lest I get "Are you alright?"s from people, off from over chatty colleagues and customers, off from security cameras everywhere. I'm off. I'm off from being Alicia the Customer Service "I get bitched to by Customers" Tan and back to being myself.

Myself who likes to sleep in and moan "five more minutes" even though the sun is high up in the air. Me, who rampages in Port Coimbra killing Brown Bison and Little Bears (PETA would have a field day with me!). I who can sit cross legged in my swivel chair, pick my nose and eat my boogers.

I jest, I don't pick my nose-bogeys and eat them. That's gross on so many levels - although slightly symbolic because I'd be eating myself.

I miss school so much. I miss the people, I miss the staying up till 3am to finish an overdue History or Literature essay, I miss mugging 12 hours straight. In a way, I long for things that I can have in my control. I want things within grasp; and while I don't hate the unpredictability of life, I want to be able to steer myself into whatever fog or mist that'll just lead me to somewhere totally unexpected.

Working makes me afraid. I'm becoming stupid and worse, ignorant. I don't want to be reduced to one of the masses - while I joke about being a sheepming (sheepxlemming for the win), I don't actually desire to be one. It's dehumanizing (wow, when have I last used that word?) and demeaning.

I have a great urge to dash into school and scream at the teachers to give me more essays.

Which is why I'm estatic and overly gratified that my brother no longer stays at the hostel. I have someone to talk to at home, no matter how inane the conversation is ("ehhh, is this shirt nice??") or even if its, shudders, math equations. I'm happy to crank my brain a bit. Whatever nutshell I have left.

Shall be off soon. Taking a walk down to the circus to catch a bus to Toa Payoh and then a train to Orchard. I'll probably pop by and visit my homie (HAHAH I JUST HAD TO SAY THAT) Rach because I haven't seen her in ages and I just want to hang around Takashimaya Gramaphone a bit.

I need to rant a bit more, pour out my soul a bit more (ala His Excellency with Ashenden) but I'll leave that for cold blustery nights. Or as cold and blustery as they can get in Singapore.